I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Randomize
