they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize