careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
