Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize
