A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize