So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
