Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
