About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Randomize
