My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Randomize
