Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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