Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
I think my nap took me to another dimension
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