did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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