Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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