you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Randomize
