Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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