we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Randomize
