I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
