I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
