You made me cry and you don't even care
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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