I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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