I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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