she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
So squirting runs in the family.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
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