What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Randomize
