I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
