Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
