This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
