I must be too annoying 4 u.
you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
