Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
