a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
