We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
