similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
