I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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