Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
