oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
