Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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