It's Friday. Sex?
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize