Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
