coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
