He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
