who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
so let's talk penis.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize