Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Randomize
