North Korea, Best Korea!
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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