I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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