i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
