never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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