Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Randomize
