Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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