Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize