maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
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