i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
